Clearing My Head

I'll tell you what, I've been pretty depressed and stressed over my cat lately. He's been pretty sick for a while now. I wrote about it a few posts back. Well, he seemed to be on the mend, and then regressed again. He's actually really, REALLY bad now. We've begun force feeding him again. We feed him this stuff that's like ensure for cats. He seems to enjoy it. I don't, however, think that he's going to get any better. I think that he's just sort of stagnating. If we were to stop feeding him, he wouldn't eat, I'm sure. He barely drinks on his own anymore. If there was anything that the vet would do for him, I'd take him there. However, the last time, they just charged me hundreds of dollars and sent him home to die. They didn't tell us about force feeding or anything. It was awful. It's awful now, too. His condition has just made me a nervous wreck. I'm pretty depressed about the whole thing. It's just darkened my whole demeanor.

I went to work today, and that didn't really help. I just didn't feel like being there. Thank goodness for the AC, too, because it was hot and humid today. Anyhow, it rained, which relieved a bit of the humidity. I got off at 10PM, and I rode my motorcycle home. That was nice. Riding my bike always helps to clear my head. I felt relaxed and calm through the whole thing. I have to say that my mind was a complete blank, too. I just couldn't think any more. The fact that my bike is so big and comfortable and easy to ride makes it great to just escape. I was able to clear my head and forget about things for a while.

When I'm on my bike, it's sort of a zen experience (if I believed in zen). I'm completely engulfed in what I'm doing, yet completely gone, too. I have to concentrate really hard to think when I'm on that bike. When you're so connected to the earth, air, and everything around you, you don't need to speak. You don't need to think. God just speaks to my spirit. That's pretty sweet. I can forget all my troubles and woes, and I just bask in the earth that our wonderful God created for us. It's so awesome to be so intimately connected to God through His nature. I really needed that ride tonight.